This article is a call to action for English teachers and an invitation to think both critically and creatively about language that has infiltrated the English teaching profession in recent years. Specifically, the article explores the use of the words 'bottom', 'clinical', 'evidence', 'rigour' and 'rubric', and the ways in which their attendant discourses attempt to position teachers within the contemporary field of evidence-based education. The article builds on an individual paper given at the 2020 International Federation for the Teaching of English Conference.