This paper presents a summary of a qualitative research study which evaluated, in case studies of three families, what it means to have a child with a disability. The research developed out of practice in early intervention and work focusing on optimal developmental environments for persons with disabilities. Background information on each of the families is provided, including data on the children's disabilities, which included mental retardation in each case. Five principal areas which emerged from interview data are identified: the children, parental stress/anxiety, services, personal comments, and survival strategies. Data acquired from questionnaires completed by the parents and from the MAPS (McGill Action Planning System) planning process are also presented. Recommendations are provided in three areas: attitude changes, policy changes, and service provision. (Contains 14 references.) (JDD)