The first point made in this presentation concerns the character of basic human needs, in relation to social groups and intimate relationships. Marjorie Fiske's report (1968) of the importance of confidants to the well-being of older persons has been replicated abundantly, but intimacy and confidants are not all people need. Older persons may also need help with money or caretaking when ill. Although grandparents continue to monitor their children and grandchildren, ready to jump in when needed, older people are glad to get on with their own lives among their peers. A review of recent gerontological caretaking research should convince readers that the best way to grow old is along with a spouse, preferably a wife. Most men use their wife or lover as their confidant. Most women turn to another woman, sometimes kin, sometimes not. In addition to friends or confidants, individuals need a community if they are to find life worth living. The second point for discussion illustrates how intimate relationships affect health and emotional well-being in extended families consisting of three generations. Poor health is related significantly to lowered happiness (not increased distress) for both men and women of the oldest generation. The effect of their perceived health status on the affect of their adult children and grandchildren, however, is much less profound. Their middle-generation daughters' happiness does not seem to be affected but distress level is higher; middle-generation sons shows no affect. (RH)