Communication theory has ignored a major component of the communicative process: the relationship which defines the sort of message being sent and how the message is to be interpreted. This relationship, not the message, is crucial to the development of personal meaning for the information being exchanged. In teaching and in all human relationships, the most positive behavior displays qualities of warmth, empathy, and genuineness. Messages which reveal whether these qualities are present or absent are vital if learning and other good behavior is to take place. They are more important than the technology and audiovisual aids which educators have been most concerned with. What distinguishes a good helper, teacher, or communicator from a poor one? It is five beliefs, which determine the kinds of relationship that develop between people. These beliefs are: 1) What do you believe is important?; 2) What do you believe people are like?; 3) What do you believe about yourself?; 4) What do you believe are your purposes?; and 5) What do you believe about your methods? (JK)